I went to the knee doctor today and got my last set of shots. I can tell the difference already. After the initial stiffness wears off, my knees feel much better. I was walking around the house without my cane tonight (my knees are usually the worst at night), and I wasn't hobbling around, either! This is supposed to get better in a month or so, I am very encouraged about this procedure.
After that, I met my dear friend, Nadine nearby at Herberger's in Stillwater, MN. She went in and did some shopping while I made some calls. She is in town from Utah for the week. We went to lunch and sat and talked awhile...it is great having girlfriends!
Then my brother, Dave called me and told me he had my supplements. (He works at a Vitamin Store in West St. Paul, and his boss gave him permission to use his employee discount for my supplements). He saved me about eighty dollars today!!! I am taking an immune system booster, and I believe it is helping me a lot, because my shingles could be a lot worse than they are. So, along with my meds, this should kick the shingles out! We sat and talked for a long while. I love my brother!
Friday, June 17, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Another Set-back
Today felt like a real set-back. I went to my regular MD for a Pre-Op. Physical. Found out I DO have shingles...
He checked the lines of sores on my front and back at chest level, and confirmed that it was, in fact Shingles. These are caused by stresses on the body and mind. They are latent Chicken Pox Virus that re-surface when trauma happens. Mine broke out the day after I got my cancer diagnosis. (My Dad had them when he had cancer, too)
SO - I have to take an anti-viral medication for 7 days, and then wait another week for the sores to fade away before he could recommend I go ahead with surgery. This is a virus that could potentially spread like wildfire if I introduce it into an open wound, and it is very close to where the surgery will be.
Well, this puts me into the time when my surgeon is going to be gone for a week. She called me today to tell me that she talked with Dr. Sievert about postponing the surgery, but now she wants me to start the chemo. BEFORE the surgery, because there is "quite a lot of cancer in my breast and lymph glands under my arm". I am not a happy camper about that one...but what do you do when you don't know what to do?
I also have a cyst growing on my right index finger, and it is starting to warp my fingernail, so I have to have that removed also...I will wait a bit on that one.
Right now I am feeling upset and bewildered...no, downright FREAKED-OUT! I shall have to calm down and then I will write some more.....
He checked the lines of sores on my front and back at chest level, and confirmed that it was, in fact Shingles. These are caused by stresses on the body and mind. They are latent Chicken Pox Virus that re-surface when trauma happens. Mine broke out the day after I got my cancer diagnosis. (My Dad had them when he had cancer, too)
SO - I have to take an anti-viral medication for 7 days, and then wait another week for the sores to fade away before he could recommend I go ahead with surgery. This is a virus that could potentially spread like wildfire if I introduce it into an open wound, and it is very close to where the surgery will be.
Well, this puts me into the time when my surgeon is going to be gone for a week. She called me today to tell me that she talked with Dr. Sievert about postponing the surgery, but now she wants me to start the chemo. BEFORE the surgery, because there is "quite a lot of cancer in my breast and lymph glands under my arm". I am not a happy camper about that one...but what do you do when you don't know what to do?
I also have a cyst growing on my right index finger, and it is starting to warp my fingernail, so I have to have that removed also...I will wait a bit on that one.
Right now I am feeling upset and bewildered...no, downright FREAKED-OUT! I shall have to calm down and then I will write some more.....
Thursday, June 9, 2011
I Hate Needles!
But I hate the pain in my knees even more, so I subjected myself to a shot in each knee again this morning. It was done by one of my Doctor's associates. He had a different approach to it, and first stuck the needle straight into the front of my knee, which began to bleed profusely...so, he said, "well, I see that is not gonna work in that spot." And then decided to shoot me from the outside of the knee.
His shots actually hurt less than last week, because he sprayed something on my skin to numb it, and that made a world of difference. It is difficult for them to get inside the knee joint, because there is no cartilidge, and so there is very little space for the needle to go.
Afterwards, it feels like pressure in my knee, but not painful. SO next week will be my last set of shots. He said it may take a while to feel the full effects. I am already more comfortable walking.
I have been finding out about more and more people that I have known, past and present who have had breast cancer and are survivors. That was reassuring. It really helps to keep my mind in a positive place.
Have a wonderful day, everyone!
Love and Hugs,
Mary
His shots actually hurt less than last week, because he sprayed something on my skin to numb it, and that made a world of difference. It is difficult for them to get inside the knee joint, because there is no cartilidge, and so there is very little space for the needle to go.
Afterwards, it feels like pressure in my knee, but not painful. SO next week will be my last set of shots. He said it may take a while to feel the full effects. I am already more comfortable walking.
I have been finding out about more and more people that I have known, past and present who have had breast cancer and are survivors. That was reassuring. It really helps to keep my mind in a positive place.
Have a wonderful day, everyone!
Love and Hugs,
Mary
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Change of Plans...
I had the idea in my head, and discussed it with a few people, that I would finish getting the shots in my knees (next two Thursdays) and then travel out to Alpine, Utah with Joni (Chuck's Mom) to see Tacy, Chuck & Fiona, and Julia & Daniel MacDonald mainly. And sit by the stream in their backyard and meditate and get my head on straight, and come back and then have my surgery.
Well, my doctor phoned me today when she heard my plans and said she is "not at all comfortable with waiting that long to do my surgery". I would not be returning until the last week of June, followed by the 4th of July weekend, and Dr. Schmidt will be gone the whole first week of July, which would push the surgery into the second week of July. I believe she honestly has my best interests at heart, and, as Daniel put it, "Mary, you've got a fire going on in there and it has to be put out". Inspired words of wisdom. I would like to believe I am wise enough to take good advice...especially when it is for my own good.
SO, I have relented, and have decided to have my surgery sooner than later. It is scheduled for June 21st, at 10:00 am, (for those of you who pray). I have to be to the hospital earlier, but that's the surgery time. It will only be an overnight stay, as long as there are no complications...I do not foresee any. So, in spite of the fact that some of you may feel inclined to come visit me at the hospital, it will not be a good idea. I will be pretty much out of it, and in need of rest. Only immediate family, please.
I will enjoy visits at home a few days later, and company as I am healing. Then the long road of radiation and chemotherapy will begin.
I truly appreciate all the love and support I have recieved from so many of you! Thank you all! Love and Hugs, Mary
Well, my doctor phoned me today when she heard my plans and said she is "not at all comfortable with waiting that long to do my surgery". I would not be returning until the last week of June, followed by the 4th of July weekend, and Dr. Schmidt will be gone the whole first week of July, which would push the surgery into the second week of July. I believe she honestly has my best interests at heart, and, as Daniel put it, "Mary, you've got a fire going on in there and it has to be put out". Inspired words of wisdom. I would like to believe I am wise enough to take good advice...especially when it is for my own good.
SO, I have relented, and have decided to have my surgery sooner than later. It is scheduled for June 21st, at 10:00 am, (for those of you who pray). I have to be to the hospital earlier, but that's the surgery time. It will only be an overnight stay, as long as there are no complications...I do not foresee any. So, in spite of the fact that some of you may feel inclined to come visit me at the hospital, it will not be a good idea. I will be pretty much out of it, and in need of rest. Only immediate family, please.
I will enjoy visits at home a few days later, and company as I am healing. Then the long road of radiation and chemotherapy will begin.
I truly appreciate all the love and support I have recieved from so many of you! Thank you all! Love and Hugs, Mary
Monday, June 6, 2011
Trying to Get Ready
I am seriously distracted by nearly EVERYTHING... I find it difficult to focus-in on "tasks at hand". There are a few things I need to organize and get ready before I have my surgery. One is rearranging my house. My bedroom is downstairs in the basement...mainly because I hate the heat in summer, and it is much cooler down there. It needs to be upstairs for my convalescence. Tacy helped me to clear out some clutter from my dresser. I am a hoarder-at-heart. If it weren't for living with Gary, I'd probably end-up on one of those TV shows. He keeps me in check. The upstairs of the house is clutter-free, and we work hard to keep it that way. The basement is another story...that's where I "store" everything I don't have the energy to rummage through and discard. Most of my clutter consists of stuff "I might use someday" and craft materials. Tacy and I threw out 5 bags of junk, and have a box started for the Salvation Army. But I am having a hard time getting my head into clearing out the rest.
Don't get me wrong...It's not like I have to crawl between piles of clutter (most of the time), or have vermin and insects, but just the amount of clutter I do have is bothersome to me, and I need to clear it away. But there are so many distractions...mostly in my head.
Don't get me wrong...It's not like I have to crawl between piles of clutter (most of the time), or have vermin and insects, but just the amount of clutter I do have is bothersome to me, and I need to clear it away. But there are so many distractions...mostly in my head.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Just another Manic Sunday...
I have been battling a cold. It has caused me to sleep long hours and I've been drinking a LOT of water...so I have to stay close to home, if you know what I mean. Besides, I don't like going to public places like this and spreading it around. Today was my neice's graduation open house. I stayed home and Gary went. I was not up to it. I slept a lot today...most likely because I need it.
At the end of the evening, I had a mini-melt-down. I just started crying out of nowhere. The reality of what I am facing is starting to sink in. I'm not excited that I have to go through this. Tomorrow I call the doctor to set-up a surgery date...not too anxious for that, either. I tried to call a few friends, but no one was answering their phones. Finally, I got ahold of Angie. She talked to me for a while and gave me a lot of reassurances. I really appreciated her being there for me. A good friend is worth a thousand counselors.
At the end of the evening, I had a mini-melt-down. I just started crying out of nowhere. The reality of what I am facing is starting to sink in. I'm not excited that I have to go through this. Tomorrow I call the doctor to set-up a surgery date...not too anxious for that, either. I tried to call a few friends, but no one was answering their phones. Finally, I got ahold of Angie. She talked to me for a while and gave me a lot of reassurances. I really appreciated her being there for me. A good friend is worth a thousand counselors.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Trying to Brace Myself...
The surgeon said I have several affected lymph glands, so radiation will have to follow surgery, so I will have to postpone reconstruction.
On the brighter side, I found out that I DO have a cancer insurance policy that will help with some of the expenses! It will even pay for my wig and prosthetics. I was so happy when I found out, I cried. What a relief!
I thought that I had cancelled the policy a while back, but it turns out, that wasn't the one that was cancelled. SO, God is looking out for me.
My knees are also feeling better already...less shooting pain in my knees when I walk. I have two more sets of injections, and I am excited!
I feel so blessed! I have had an outpouring of love from so many sources...And, I love ALL of you back! With all of this positive energy coming my way, I just know I can beat this. Thank you, everyone!
On the brighter side, I found out that I DO have a cancer insurance policy that will help with some of the expenses! It will even pay for my wig and prosthetics. I was so happy when I found out, I cried. What a relief!
I thought that I had cancelled the policy a while back, but it turns out, that wasn't the one that was cancelled. SO, God is looking out for me.
My knees are also feeling better already...less shooting pain in my knees when I walk. I have two more sets of injections, and I am excited!
I feel so blessed! I have had an outpouring of love from so many sources...And, I love ALL of you back! With all of this positive energy coming my way, I just know I can beat this. Thank you, everyone!
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